Did something stupid after libel case postponed for two weeks. Went home and took large amount of catnip. This wouldn't have been problem in itself as impossible to overdose on it. However, unbeknownst to me, there were also some eucalyptus leaves and these, as any cat lover knows, are toxic to cats.
When Saussure came home from giving lecture on Socrates, he found me groaning in agony in basket and immediately dialled 999, forgetting this was emergency number for humans, not animals. When services realised it was a cat in need, they arranged for emergency vet ambulance to fetch me, and I was admitted to Hospital for Small Animals (attached to University of Edinburgh). Had stomach pumped.
Hospital kept me in for several days so I could undergo psychiatric evaluation. Suggestions this was a deliberate attempt to end my life are rubbish but couldn't convince staff of this. Of course, they all knew about court case and thought whole thing had been too much for me. Psychiatric evaluation showed that although I was somewhat quirky and stubborn, there was nothing wrong with my mood or self-esteem. I could have told them that. After all, haven't I been busy writing my Granny Elena's memoirs? Nevertheless, when hospital recommended holiday was what I needed, decided they were right, and it was time to return to my beloved Moscow to see my family. Consultant said he'd write to my advocate, Justice Chatterton, to say I wouldn't be fit to resume court case for several months.
When got home, big question was why we had catnip plant doctored with eucalyptus leaves. Eventually Neville owned up to having bought it from a door-to-door salesman as present to cheer me up. He was distraught when he'd heard I'd been admitted to hospital. Had been too frightened to visit me in case any of the staff arrested him. When we teased him about this, he told me he'd got as far as the reception area when he'd seen a police car, so had gone straight home. He'd spent three days hiding in tartan shopping bag with wheels
Had lovely meal with Saussure, Notsaussure and Neville before flying to Moscow following day.
More in next letter.
Purrs, Bakhtin
